Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Can I Allow.......

can I allow myself to forgive
to have the luxury of peace,joy
to let my mask slip revealing all

my very soul and essence__

for a little while should I
allow them to know and see me
can I put away my dreams of darkness

allowed at last to be free__
free of this worlds madness
to lay down my burden,my pain

free of fear,regrets,sorry__
let my spirit soar among the angels
yet my affinity with death is so strong

I am tired and my heart is hollow


Amias said...

Give yourself a break --- and allow yourself not to worry about such things, just live! At least that is what I am trying to do.

Enjoyed the read.

SandyCarlson said...

Let your heart soar! So full of feeling--it is not hollow!

Geraldine said...

YOur last line really hit home...

A thoughtful take on this prompt, well done.

Hugs, G

anthonynorth said...

We delve into such thoughts to free ourselves, tackle our frustrations and then put them aside, and live.
Beautiful words.

ann said...

I think it may be self-destructive not to forgive or not to seek peace and joy - your words resonate with so many emotions

hope you are doing well Melanie -

lotsa luv ann xoxoxox

Patti said...

beautiful and somewhat haunting...I can relate to the first 2 stanzas completely~

The Write Girl said...

This is an amazing poem which everyone can relate to...how wonderful would it be to lay all burdens down. Beautifully written. I love your writing : )

Jim said...

Oh B.D, please, please endure for a bit more. Your poet has had a tough time, I do think it will serve no purpose to linger on these things more.
I say forget as best you can. If forgiving will HELP to forget, then forgive.

I lived this life for over a year, I got a little apartment in the cheap part of town, an unlisted phone, didn't socialize, and essentially 'holed up.'

Crow eating time came when I paid off the J.C.Penny's card, started to the beach to 'celebrate' but my eight year old VW Bug broke on the road. My ex and her new 'other' hauled me home from out in the boonies in the formerly 'our' new Ford.

I vowed to never to have that happen again, I didn't deserve life like that. So I bought a one year old Ford Thunderbird and made a life that I didn't think even existed.

Mrs. Jim recivilised me three years later but those three years before of a life I never had before were the best of my life.

I forgave in my heart (almost, pretty much) but never did a confrontation to say I forgave.

There are other bits but I've written too much already.

I did have some health problems as well, but nothing like you are experiencing.

((((( Hugs ))))

This is wonderful poetry even though it relates to problems we don't like to confront.

Jeeves said...

This is deep and kind of resonates and rings

The Dark Lord said...

Enjoyed the read very much... the words sure strike home.. I guess we all face such troubles, and deal with them in our own unique ways.. I'd say the whole process is a worthy experience that is highly educating for us, and we learn to cope better...

Rinkly Rimes said...

It is wonderful when we finally forgive ourselves and allow ourselves to be less than perfect. Poetry will help you I know.

Tammie Lee said...

Your poem is full of feeling and pondering the possibilities of life. Forgiving can seem impossible and then it can just happen,,,, like slipping into a warm pond.